Solidarity Sister!

Creating Community Through Podcasting with Karaleigh Garrison | Ep 28

• Kristin Wilson • Season 1 • Episode 28

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How do you connect with other women when you have high needs children? For Karaleigh Garrison, the answer is podcasting. Learn about the significant challenges Karaleigh has faced as a mom to three special needs kids and a wife to a husband with some serious health issues. See how she has come out of the darkness and into light and connection through hosting two podcasts and teaching others how they too can Podcast Like a Mother.

TODAY Karaleigh is hosting a free one hour webinar called “Mobile Podcasting Made Easy.” Did you even know you can produce a podcast straight from your phone? Karaleigh can show you how. Register at this link to make sure you get the replay even if you can't attend:  http://subscribepage.io/CBSnhl

Her Podcast Like a Mother Podcast Creation course is a great option if you’re looking for more than just one hour of support. I love the way Karaleigh has made the first two segments free, so you can get an idea of what she can offer you before needing to order.  Find the course here: https://podcastlikeamother.thinkific.com/courses/podcastcreationcourse

About Karaleigh:

Karaleigh Garrison is a Podcast Coach, Speaker, and Singer/Songwriter. She has a podcast and album that are both titled "Seeking Sunshine," inspired by her three amazing children who all have varying levels of special needs. She also recently launched her second podcast, called "Podcast Like A Mother," where she teaches how podcasting can be fun, easy, and sustainable. Karaleigh is deeply passionate about inspiring others to do what lights them up because she knows that we are all better humans when our cups are full. She guides others to a greater sense of purpose and helps them cultivate courage in the face of adversity, strive for momentum even when it’s messy, and authentically align their purpose with the divine.

Find Karaleigh at:

Website: www.karaleighgarrison.com
Seeking Sunshine Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/seeking-sunshine/id1589826112
Podcast Like A Mother Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/podcast-like-a-mother/id1718846989
Facebook: Karaleigh Garrison
Instagram: @karaleigh.garrison

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If you're a woman who appreciates connecting with other women in community with vulnerability and compassion, please join us in the Solidarity Sister! Facebook group at:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/716800349946338/

The Solidarity Sister! Book Club has begun and runs through the end of May. We're reading Brené Brown's Gifts of Imperfection over a period of 15 weeks, and connecting via Zoom and Marco Polo. Find more info in the FB group. Sign up at https://forms.gle/ZHpfhd8hwCpw6NL2A

FB: The Solidarity Sister Podcast
IG: @solidaritysister.kristinwilson 


Karaleigh

But you know what, that's the magic of podcasting because I've got three kids but they all have special needs and until I started podcasting I was like nope, I'm I'm stuck in this bubble. We're in therapy and school and all these things all day long. I don't have the ability to go have friends and I feel so disconnected from other moms. And it wasn't until I started my podcast that I was like, yeah. Oh my gosh, I'm not alone. There are so many other moms. There's so many other people. There's so much out there in this big, huge world. I don't have to stay trapped in this bubble. And what's more, I can podcast with my kids at home. I can do it messy. I can do it, whatever way works.

Kristin

I am so excited to get to share this particular episode with you today. Karaleigh Garrison is a podcast coach, speaker, singer songwriter, and the mama of three special needs kids. I'm also grateful to call her a friend. Buckle up and hold on tight as Karaleigh takes us on a journey through some heavy survival years with trials and triumphs leading her to where she stands today and tune into the end to learn about how you can work with Karaleigh. If you've ever considered starting your own podcast,

Outro Music

Kristin

Hello and welcome to another episode of Solidarity Sister. I have Karaleigh today. She runs a podcast and helps women who are learning to podcast, which is fantastic. So I'm really excited to have her because she has been a huge part of my podcast community, and we're talking a lot about community here. So Karaleigh, tell me, how are you doing today for real?

Karaleigh

I'm doing so much better than I was yesterday and the last few days, like I'm feeling like a human being again after we've been sick for a week, a little over a week actually, so I'm doing pretty good. I didn't take Tylenol today, so that's really like a strong indication of how I'm actually doing because I've been really dependent on Tylenol to function for the last week and a half, so yay!

Kristin

That's fantastic. It always makes it hard when the family gets sick over the holidays. Yes. It's an especially difficult time, so I'm glad that you are feeling better.

Karaleigh

Well, and what's more, my husband's feeling better because he's back at work today and he was home sick the last two days, and when the husband's feeling sick, it's almost worse than me being sick.

Kristin

I feel that. Yes. I do understand. It is a rough run. So, what are you listening to lately? What are some of your favorite podcasts, audiobooks, music, like what's in your ear?

Karaleigh

Oh my gosh. So I, I just started this community. It is called the Podcaster Support Network and one of my New Year's goals is to listen to as many new podcasts as I possibly can. So I have like a gajillion new podcasts on my list. So that I can, you know, just support all of these people and I have been listening to some really amazing brand new podcasts. So the one I literally just finished listening to and reviewing is called True Fertility and I listened to several of her episodes and they were so good and I'm like, I've not struggled with fertility, but like listening to these women's stories, they were really good. So her name, I'm gonna have to look it up is, leah Nicole Trujillo and her podcast is called True Fertility and like, I'm like, this is not even a topic that I dealt with in my life, but hearing these women and their stories is just like, you just love them for their stories and their authenticity and. It was so good to hear their stories, so that was the one I just finished listening to. It was so good. I loved it.

Kristin

And I think that there's such a value in being able to hear the stories of people having experiences that are not the experiences you've had. Like, there's a place for having a support group or whatever for what your difficulties are, but it opens you up so much more when you're willing to take a look at other people's hard. Yes. Can we really know what it's like if you haven't struggled with infertility? Do you really know what that's like? No. But the more that you listen and hold space for people that that is really a huge part of their life's journey, the better we become at showing up for other people because we get at least a glimpse of understanding just by listening and really trying to sit with that and hold space for that. So I love

Karaleigh

Yeah. And the truth is like, we've all felt those feelings. And if we haven't, like, had those exact experiences, we've all felt those feelings. And like, in my Seeking Sunshine podcast, I've interviewed lots of people with all sorts of different stories. There's this quote from Mr. Rogers, which I think it's actually wrongly attributed to him, but whatever, it's, you, when you hear someone's story, you can't help but love them and it's, it's just really true. It is. It

Kristin

is. It is. I think so often when we really are able to just be quiet and listen. And hold space for that we just, we can't help but love people, even the people that don't really resonate with us or that maybe we don't see the world the same way we at least are then able to understand why they behave the way they do. I know, my brain doesn't work like a lot of people. I'm sure there are times where people are like. I can't believe she's doing that or like she's doing it that way. But if they were inside my brain, it makes sense.

Karaleigh

Well, and to me, that's the true gift of podcasting. And that's why I'm obsessed with podcasting is because you just how many other times in your day do you sit and just. Listen to somebody else. Do you just sit face to face and only like no multitasking, no, you know, other agenda where you just sit face to face and have a conversation with someone. And as a podcaster, I get to do that. I get to hear people's stories and just do that and connect with people. And so for me, podcasting is the best form of social media because. We're really connecting here in a way that we don't do on other platforms. It's the best. My favorite.

Kristin

I started this podcast because I just felt so strongly that it was something I had to do and I don't even listen to podcasts. That's kind of one of my goals is to make myself do that. I listen to tons of audiobooks, like hundreds a year. But I haven't been a podcast listener, so I felt a little bit like an imposter, but I was like, sometimes you just have this inner knowing that there's something that whether you want to, depending on where you're coming from, the universe or God or whatever is presenting to you and saying, this is for you and you just have the option to say yes or no. And so I said, yes, but what I didn't anticipate was the beauty of the community. Within podcasting. And every time I have an interview, like how often in my day as a mom of eight kids, seven who are still at home, do I get to sit for 45 minutes to an hour and talk to another person in a super connected and vulnerable way? It just doesn't happen. I think I'm gonna have to have my neighbors that I really like on as guests, just so I can,, book an hour for us to talk. Like, how do you arrange that in your regular everyday life? But it's this connection that most of social media is kind of missing. There's this emptiness. It's like a false connection, which sometimes I do think there are places where you can still really connect on Facebook or Instagram, but that's not the norm. That's not the way it's really set up. Whereas well, and podcasting is set up to be more inherently connected.

Karaleigh

There's an authenticity. To hearing somebody speak where it's not filtered through, I don't know, photos and, and literal filters and, you know, agendas and all these other things. That you, that just comes through in podcasting like no other way. And like, you and I are not that far apart, geographically.

Kristin

And it's like. We're like an hour away from each other. I know. Here we are on Zoom and we're just gonna. Embrace that and

Karaleigh

go. But you know what, that's the magic of podcasting because like you've got, you have all these kids and it's so hard as a mom to get out of that bubble and I've got three kids but they all have special needs and until I started podcasting I was like nope, I'm I'm stuck in this bubble. We're in therapy and school and all these things all day long. I don't have the ability to go have friends and I feel so disconnected from other moms. I feel so alone. I feel so trapped in this bubble of motherhood and so many other moms feel like that, whether or not their kids have special needs and all that. It's motherhood can feel so isolating. And it wasn't until I started my podcast that I was like, yeah. Oh my gosh, I'm not alone. There are so many other moms. There's so many other people. My life's not the only life that's hard. Like, there's so much out there in this big, huge world. I don't have to stay trapped in this bubble. And what's more, I can podcast with my kids at home. I can do it messy. I can do it, you know, whatever way works.

Kristin

It's absolutely doable. So tell me about your experiences with community. You talked about being isolated as a mom and now you're kind of coming into these different communities, like where are you finding community right now? Are you finding it at all in real life or is it more just through podcasting and through these virtual connections?

Karaleigh

It really is through podcasting and through virtual connections because in person is still really difficult. Because I have three kids with special needs and they take a lot of physical reining in, should I say? I have high functioning autistic nine year old and thirteen year old and they're pretty good when we're in public. I mean, at home they fight a lot, but in public they're, they're pretty good. But then I also have a severely autistic, semi verbal, diabetic 12 year old. And he is a little wild when we're in public. He's a little bit he's the one who's running all over the place, trying to open everyone's car, and trying to open all the doors, and do all the things, and he's a little, he's the one who needs my attention. Every single moment, and when I'm trying to socialize with other people in public, my attention is very divided because it's on him, because it's trying to keep him safe. And, you know, we're getting to the point where it's not as necessary as it used to be. It used to be he would run through the parking lots and open other people's cars while they were driving and it was really unsafe. We'd pull into a parking lot and he'd be unbuckled and out the front door because the two side doors would be child locked. He'd be out that front door before I could unbuckle my seatbelt and like out the car. And it, it was so fast. And it was so dangerous. Like, I was so worried about him being hit by a car, and it took, I mean, keeping him safe took, like, like, I was so hyper vigilant all the time, just every ounce of my energy and of my attention was on keeping that kid safe, and yeah, I had two other kids to also pay attention to, and like, they didn't get as much of my attention as they probably should have because I was constantly trying to keep Joshua safe And so as far as social interactions were concerned, It was like, well, sorry. You know I mean, a really hilarious example of this just happened like a year, not even a year ago, we went to a church function and it was somebody in our church had they do Smoothies, they have a big smoothie after church party and they invite everyone over for smoothies and it's so great and we walked over to have smoothies and there was this new couple and they walked over and she had this orange energy drink and they were brand new no one knew them yet and my son Joshua walked straight up to her pulled her energy drink right out of her hand and drank it all. Because he's been a drink thief since he could walk. Like, if someone has a soda, he's gonna steal it. And he hadn't done it in a while, so it took me by surprise, and I had forgotten for a half a second to be hypervigilant and she was like. Oh, and like, is the caffeine gonna hurt him? And like, and I'm like, no, he's fine. I'm so sorry. Like, I know she was fine and it was, it was fine, but it was just one of those like, Oh, I forgot to be on for a second. I talked to somebody. I wasn't as on edge as I'm supposed to be for a second.

Kristin

Is you have these experiences, what are the most helpful and unhelpful responses you've gotten from people? Cause we've all been out, you know, at a grocery store or somewhere where a kid is like going. Bunkers in whatever way, what do you find is helpful or not helpful from the people around you? Because I think there are times where people can actually make it better. And then there are times where people really just like kick you while you're down.

Karaleigh

What's helpful is, is patience and understanding. What's really helpful is always assume that people are doing their best. Yes. Always assume that everyone is trying their very best. I mean, you never you know how much or how little sleep that mom got that night. For sure. Like, you just never know, like, what else is going on in any given moment. And I've had people, you know, I've had good reactions and I've had bad reactions. One of the things that Joshua loves to do is push the button on the receipt tape machine. And so, every store that we go to, I have to be really, really aware, because any time he's within running distance. of the receipt tape machine in the checkout line. He's gonna push the button and the little button on the receipt tape machine that makes the receipt tape go and I've had all sorts of reactions to this, and you should know that A, I'm totally aware he's gonna do this. I'm doing everything in my power to stop it, and he's very, very fast. He's very strong, and I can't always stop him. I've got two other kids who fight non stop. And he's

Kristin

bigger now. I think sometimes that's harder. Like, it's easier to physically manage than a 12 year old. Yeah,

Karaleigh

he's 12. So I'm, you know, trying. Everything in my power to make sure this doesn't happen, but I fail probably half the time. And so I've had people go, oh, it's fine, just let him push it. And I'm like, no, no, no, I'm trying to teach him not to. So, no, it's, it's not fine. Here, just let him do it. No, I don't want him to do it. So, yes, be patient. But then I've also had people freak out and be like, he's gonna push it. Don't do it! And I'm like I'm obviously wrestling my kid to the ground in this very moment. You can probably see me sweating my face off. Like, you're panicking, it's not helping the situation here. Like, clearly I'm doing everything to stop him. So, like, that's also

Kristin

not helpful. No. Overreaction. Right. And, like,

Karaleigh

just patience and understanding and just assuming that I'm doing everything I can to stop this. And it's not always an option for me to not take my kid to the store with me. It used to be an option to keep him in the cart all the time. But now he's 12 and that's not an option anymore. Yes.

Kristin

So what about, like, people who would know, you know, like, we all know moms that have some special needs kids that are really challenging. I mean, I think of one mom that I know that I grew up with and I don't live near her. But like, what are the things I could do or say that would be more helpful and more supportive to her, like a care package kind of item to send or something like, what makes you feel seen and heard and understood either the people who live close to you or, you know, who live far away, but care and notice, what would make you feel supported?

Karaleigh

You know, just, just saying that, like just saying, I see you is so powerful. Like, you really don't understand the impact of those words, like, to everyone. Not just to, to moms like me, but to people who are starting their podcasts, like, that's one of the things I've been trying to do, that's one of my, like, New Year's goals is like to reach out to all these new podcasters and be like, I've listened! I've been listening to your new episodes! They're so good. I see you. I see how good it is. I see how hard you're working. You're truly great. Keep going. And like, to say that to any mom, to say that to any person, we never can hear that enough of, I see you, and what you're doing matters, and you're working so hard, and it's not going unnoticed. You're making a difference. You're making an impact. You have influence in this world because we don't get told that often enough. It doesn't matter what your circumstance is, the effort that you're putting forth matters. It's making a difference. everyone needs to hear that. I

Kristin

agree with you. I've seen several of my friends post this like, you know, tell me something you're proud of that you did in 2023 kind of a thing. And I love to read those because I learned things that I didn't know. And this year I actually. I felt like, Oh my gosh, I'm starting this podcast. Like, I actually feel proud of something I did because the last couple of years have been absolute just survival. And I felt like I would have been the one who was like, you know, like we're all still alive. We survived. Like that would have been like the accomplishment. And I see people post that and I keep going to them and saying. But that is huge because I've been there in some years, like you cannot underscore like the hugeness of an accomplishment that it is some years to just say, I survived this whole year. Because some years are just so hard that you're not going to be out starting a podcast going to be running the marathon or starting a new business or volunteering a million hours or whatever. Like, literally, you're going to have just made it.

Karaleigh

I have a decade of those years. I have an entire Decade of those years, because for anyone who doesn't know my story, I've got, I've got my three kids with special needs, but also my husband was disabled, is disabled. He's actually doing way better now. He's, he's had this crazy miraculous recovery, but he's been disabled for a decade where he was collapsing multiple times a week and I was carrying him to bed for a decade. Like I was in that survival mode for a decade where survival was all we could muster was like getting through. And so like you build on that time That time is how those lessons. That's how I got here. I built on all that time to get to where I'm at now. Like it's those stories that I tell now in my podcast.

Kristin

And those are the things that gave you the resilience and the problem solving and the creativity. And the passion to move forward when the time could allow that. Yeah. And when life could shift in different ways. And I think there's so much value in hearing that because there are times where we are just in a valley that feels like it will literally never end. We're just going and slogging through and it can be very just depressing to feel like it will never be any different. Like, this is what life is, and I don't think that's true. I do think there are seasons that 100 percent are that way. But I think that life has so much that's fantastic to offer us too. And the light always comes. There's so much in nature that reminds us of that, that like every day there's a new sunshine, you know, every month we have a new month, the moon makes a cycle. We see the leaves fall off the trees and there's new buds, like sometimes winter's really long and then spring comes. And so I think that's powerful to be able to look at the people around us and acknowledge the people who are in winter and say like, I see you, I see all the things that you're doing and striving for. And that is so hard. And to learn to celebrate. The happy part, you know, like when spring comes and it's better and it's summer and I live for summer. I hate winter. It is snowing here and I hate it.

Karaleigh

Yeah, same here. I was like, what is all this? I hate this. I don't know

Kristin

why. a meme that was like, you know, whether you hate it or not, it's still snowing. So you might as well like snow or something like that. And I was like, no, I'm actually going to still hate it. Thank you. I reserve the right to hate the winter.

Karaleigh

Don't tell my husband. I turned the heater up to 77 and I have a blanket on. My basement where I have my office is freezing, and so the rest of the house is warm, but my basement's not, and then I'll turn the heater down later.

Kristin

Spring will come. So tell me about some of your biggest life challenges. We've talked about this a little bit, but you know, as you face these different things, like, where are the places that people have shown up for you?

Karaleigh

So my biggest challenge is, we had our worst year ever in 2018. So it was about halfway through 2018, right? Before the pandemic. So then when the pandemic hit, I was like, wait, this is it? This is the worst thing in the world? Oh, this is easy. I can handle this. All we have to do is sit home and do nothing. Oh, no one's dying. I can handle this. So it, the beginning of 2018, we lived in San Antonio, Texas, and it was right at the peak of my husband's disability. And he has something called familial episodic ataxia, which is a genetic chromosomal defect. So he wasn't disabled by some big event. It was a really kind of slow, like, right around that time he turned 30 it just started getting worse and worse and worse and it started with like he would have panic attacks and back spasms and he would be crying on the floor in a ball and just Racked in pain and no

Kristin

idea what

Karaleigh

was going on. Yeah, it took like five years before he finally Got the right diagnosis and got everything. I mean, he also has other diagnoses. He's probably on the autism spectrum. He's, which we have three kids with autism, so that all totally lines up. And he's got severe debilitating PTSD. He's got depression and anxiety. He's got. chronic back pain and all sorts of different kind of diagnoses. Ataxia is a really fascinating condition. But when it's episodic, a lot of doctors don't believe you because it's really rare. And so no one's ever heard of it. And so basically he would, he would Tremble and collapse and stutter when he was speaking and he couldn't hold his own weight and he couldn't stand back up. And so I'd have to lift him and carry him to bed. And then he was so weak that he couldn't function for hours or days after an episode. This one, I mean, it was really, really bad for a few years, and then he was put on this, this water pill that seemed to help and, but he wasn't able to work for a few years, and so he finally, you know, got on all the right meds, and he he was on about 12 different prescription medications for like really strong pain pills and antidepressants and all these different sort of things.

Kristin

And nothing's going to make your depression feel worse than being bedridden and having your body fall apart. You know, like, even if you were. Supposed to have depression. There's a whole emotional component. Oh, yeah. Mental component. Anytime someone is working through severe physical challenges.

Karaleigh

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. And so he finally was approved for SSI, which took a few years of applying for. And so at the beginning of 2018 we got this. back pay and he'd been not able to work for years so we had zero income and I was caring for him and all three kids and at that time two of our kids had autism diagnoses and we were doing four hours of therapy after school every day and he was home with our baby with our youngest which Only worked sometimes because for a while of it, he couldn't stay home with the kids. He couldn't watch the kids because he kept collapsing. And that was really unsafe. And, and his, he would collapse anytime he was too stressed out. And that could be physical stress or emotional stress. And our kids were really stressful. I mean, I was telling you about Joshua running out of the car. Like, Josh wrecked our truck when he was like four years old. Like, it was, which was actually because There was a defect in our truck, like, there were no keys in the car when he was able to pull it in reverse and it rolled back and wrecked, so, like, it wasn't actually our fault that he wrecked the truck, it was because you're not supposed to be able to pull the car into reverse when there's No, if there's no

Kristin

keys, it's supposed to be okay.

Karaleigh

Yes, so, yeah, I had gone to go get the mail, which was five feet away, and left him in the car with no keys in the car. Well, I walked five feet away to get the mail. So that was, anyway, a different story, but so we, we got everything like kind of tentatively settled. Like we, we finally got the SSI in, we got all the meds, we got the doctors all settled, all the kids were in therapy and it was like, okay, we're kind of living, kind of, right? And then we got this impression of like, You need to go finish your degrees at BYU. And we were like, what? Because we lived a few blocks from his parents, and they were watching our kids all the time while I took him to the hospital, because he, we had a whole year in 2015 where he was admitted to the hospital every month. Like, he had back surgery at the end of 2015, and, we relied on them really heavily. And so we, we had this really strong feeling that we needed to move back to Utah. And we were like, Nope. Hate Utah. Don't want to do it.

Kristin

Pass. I can relate. No, thanks, God. I

Karaleigh

don't want to do that. But it was really strong and undeniable. And so we were praying about it and I just knew. We just knew we were supposed to move back to Utah. And so I had this experience where I was praying about it and I was like, okay, fine, we're supposed to move back to Utah. But are we going to be okay? And I got this really clear answer of like, it's not just going to be okay, it's going to be amazing. And then what followed was the worst year of our lives. And we, we took the leap and we moved back to Utah and the closest family we had was his like 90 year old grandma up in Salt Lake. So we moved to Provo. So it was about an hour away for anyone who doesn't know Utah. And so she wasn't, she's amazing, but she's not tons of help with our autistic kiddos. And, you know, so we moved away from our support system when we moved up to Utah. To Provo, and we tried to move into this rental house, and they stole a bunch of money from us, because the unit was not live in ready like we thought it was, and they refused to give us our money back, and take us to court, and threatened to sue us into the ground, and it was a whole thing, so they stole a whole bunch of money from us, and then we found what I thought was our dream, it was our miracle house, I was, So grateful for a miracle house and we moved in and. like August and then the week before Christmas, the landlord showed up and we'd never met him before. I didn't know who he was. And he showed up at our front door and pointed his gun in my husband's face and undid years and years and years of therapy just like that. And that was awful. And I had auditioned for the school of music to study opera when I started BYU in 2008. So a decade before this, when I was brand new. I was like, I'm gonna, my dream in life was to sing and be a singer. And I didn't get into the School of Music in 2008. Got married, had kids, we moved away, you know, and it was like, okay, I'm going to come back to BYU and I'm going to get in the School of Music. And that's going to be why my life's been so hard. It was because I was going to fulfill this dream. And so I was gearing up to audition again for the School of Music. So my audition was in December, and I was taking lessons again, and I was, I was so excited. I was like, this is it. I'm, this is it. I'm so ready for this. And in October, so, we, We moved back in August and Jacob and I were both full time students at BYU. Three kids at three different schools. So Aurora was, I think she was in first grade. She was like eight. Maybe first or second. think she was in second. She was eight. Joshua was seven. So I think he was in first and he was severely autistic and completely and utterly nonverbal. And then Benjamin was in pre k and we had him at some preschool a few days a week. And he did not have his autism diagnosis yet. He got it a few years later. And so three kids at three different schools, Jacob and I were both full time students at BYU. And it's one of those experiences, this one that like, You just don't forget like seared into my brain because it was the first Saturday of October, which is one that we don't forget. Joshua walked out of his room that morning and he was really sick. And now I'd had this experience like a week before where. Josh was completely nonverbal and he was seven and we had, I had this like Facebook meltdown where I like went on Facebook live and I like cried and I was like, my son's never going to talk. I give up. He's never going to, he's never going to say I love you. He's never going to say mom. I give up because I can't handle hoping for this anymore. He's seven. We've had intensive therapy since he was two. I can't keep hoping for this. Obviously God has decided that this is our life and I just can't keep Praying for this because we were, we had, you know, my three year old Benjamin, our whole family, but I, you know, my little three year old Benjamin was praying with our family that Joshua would have a voice one day, and I couldn't keep listening to that night after night after night, like it was tearing my heart out. So I had this Facebook meltdown where I was crying and I was like, I give up. I cannot keep hoping that Josh is going to talk someday. And so Josh, about a week later was the first Saturday of October and Josh woke up that morning and he was. Totally different, because Josh is my very, very, very hyperactive kiddo, you know, running out the front door to open people, I mean, he opened our neighbor's car while they were backing out of their driveway while I was hanging up Christmas decor, like, scary, like, bounced off the walls, we had to have him on so many meds just to keep him, like, At a super hyper level, like, he was so dangerous all the time and he walked out of his room, slowly, walked, didn't run, but he looked like he had lost a ton of weight overnight and like, he liked to come out of his room like in just his underwear and you could see like his thigh gap and you could see his ribs and I was like, what happened? Have I been so busy with, with college and with this move that I just didn't notice, like, what is wrong with me, that I didn't see this before. And I, and I had to message his teacher and go, did he look like this yesterday? And she's like, no, he looks like he lost 10 pounds overnight. Like, what happened? And so he walked in the living room and curled up in a ball and all he did was sleep for the next three days. And I had this like internal Conflict in my head of like oh my gosh, she's dying like something's horribly wrong and like no, he's just He's just sick. He's just got a stomach bug or whatever, like, he's just sick. Just calm down. And I let the logical side win and, and you know, we went through the weekend and by Monday, I was like, all right, he's still sick. So I took him to the pediatrician and I had to carry him into her office because he was so weak. He couldn't walk into the office and I was like, something's really wrong here. And I get in there and he is laying on the floor of her office. Who weren't even laying on the bed and she didn't even look at him. She's like, it's just a stomach bug. It's not a big deal. You know, he's got autism. We could get a blood sample, but it's too hard to get blood from a kid with autism. So just give it a few more days. He'll be fine. And I'm going, look, I've got three kids. We've been through a lot of stomach bugs. I'm not new here. I've done this before. This is not like anything I've ever seen. Something is really wrong.

Kristin

Like that mom intuition.

Karaleigh

And so she did nothing and sent us home with nothing. And I was like, and so my husband and I are still full time college students and we're trading off who's staying home with the sick kid. And so a couple of days later on Wednesday I I'm in class and my husband texts me a picture. Of Joshua laying in bed, which Joshua would never lay in bed. He only slept on the floor and all, but he looked, he looked drastically worse, like his, his skin was gray and his eyes were sunken in. And I took one look at that picture and I was like. No, no, no, I'm not gonna sit here and watch my kid die, I'm not, not doing it. And I left in the middle of my class, and I took him to the ER, and they took one look at him and they knew. And they were like, we need to get blood from this kid. Right now. And let me tell you, it took five grown men and me holding him down. This kid who I had to carry in to the ER because he was so weak he couldn't walk, took five grown men and me to hold him down because he fought like a saber toothed tiger to get one little drop of blood from his finger. We're not talking like a big IV or whatever. We're talking like a prick of blood from his finger. But all it took was one drop of blood from his finger, and that was the answer, and he was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes, and he was in diabetic ketoacidosis, and he was definitely dying, and so they, they actually sent us to primary children's because that was It's in Riverton. It's the place to go. Yes.

Kristin

Yes. And you have a child of in Utah or anywhere in the surrounding states, that is the place to go. It

Karaleigh

really is. They were amazing. So they sent us to primary and I get up there and they admit us and I'm like, you guys don't understand who this kid is. He's gonna burn the hospital down, and he's gonna change language on all your computers to Japanese, like, you don't know who this kid is as soon as he wakes back up, like, you don't know, you don't know what this kid's capable of, and they were, they were really great, and they had a nurse, like, just stare, stare at the door. All night long, so I could sleep, because I was like, any moment, he's gonna wake back up, tear this place apart. And they had to keep getting, like, finger pricks of blood every, I don't know, every hour or something, and every single time they did, like, they didn't have a team, it was just me and the nurse, and he would, like, tear chunks of my hair out, and then, like, we couldn't get any more, but he was severely dehydrated, like, they had to have an IV, and, like, this was my worst nightmare, to have this kid hospitalized. But till the next day. He didn't wake up for like three days. Like he basically just like slept all day for three days. The next day they had me do all this parent training of like, here's, you know, you just have to count every single bite he eats for the rest of his life and stick him with needles forever, you know, to keep him alive for the rest of his life. That's all. And I had, I had my moment out with God where I was like, Hey, this is not okay. This is not my definition of amazing or okay. Or any of anything in between, like. Hello. But I come back to that moment all the time because it's really easy for us to get stuck in these moments where we can't see the big picture, where all we can see Is this thing that's going wrong right now and we can't see the next chapter and we can't see the miracle that's ahead of us. And we can't see how God's working in our lives and all we can see is, is what's right in front of us. And so whenever I'm feeling like this current thing that's happening to me is the worst thing in the world, I go back to that moment in the hospital because it reminds me that there's so much more ahead that I can't imagine. Yet. And I just have to wait. Just have to wait, because There's more ahead than I can even fathom right now. And so, Josh was in the hospital, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, when they sent us home. And he went back to school on Monday, and he pooped in the potty for the first time in his life. We'd been trying to potty train that kid for like four years! And just like that, he pooped in the potty because there's this thing that happens after you get diagnosed with type 1 diabetes where you're starving all of a sudden. And he had been chronically underweight for years and years and years, and we'd even tried prescription medications to get his weight up. And all of a sudden he was eating. I mean, all he would eat was corndogs. So he was eating like nine corndogs a day. We were like going to Costco and buying like a bunch of the Costco sized bags of corndogs. But he was eating and like we hadn't been able to get him to eat before and now he was eating. And finally he was gaining weight that we'd been trying to get him to gain weight like his whole life. And within a month he could say all of his colors. And we'd been trying to get him, I mean, we didn't have a single word that meant. anything up until this point and and his speech just skyrocketed from that moment on. And then within a year, I was begging for him to shut up because he was talking all the time. And, you know, he's got childhood apraxia of speech for a long, so for a long time, he was talking and talking and talking, and it was really hard for him to understand, but now we're five years later, and He's not that hard to understand anymore, which is I had this thing I love to say, which is that there's blessings in every trial and trials and every blessing. And so, I thought type one diabetes was the worst thing imaginable, and it turned out to be this huge, huge blessing. And I wanted for so long for Josh to talk. And now I sit here, and all he does is he yells penis jokes through church all Sunday. And I'm a little bit like, Oh yeah, I really

Kristin

wanted him to do this! I prayed for this! And he

Karaleigh

tells Grandma and Grandpa to shut up all day long, and I'm like, Oh, yes!

Kristin

I prayed for this!

Karaleigh

Now he says whatever he wants to, and I'm like, Oh yeah! This is what I

Kristin

wanted!

Karaleigh

And it's it's all in your perspective, right? Of like, is this a blessing or is this a trial? It's always both. It's always both. But so he was diagnosed and I auditioned for the School of Music in December and I I got through to the second round and in February was my second or January was my second round of auditions and I found out in February that I didn't get in and I actually had them reach out to me and say, please don't give up. You were so close and they only let like three or four people in. It's like a really, really difficult program. Yeah, and and they reached out to me and they were like go audition to this school and this school and this school like you Are so close don't give up and I was so devastated that I don't even think I responded to their email and I I didn't think I was gonna ever sing again. Like I was like Obviously like singing's not meant for me just this dream. I had my whole life. I'm obviously terrible at it Like no one wants me ever but as Joshua You know, began to talk more and more and more, okay, because these life lessons that we look back right and I tell you the story of Joshua, it's not like I realized it all at once. It's not like I was like, Oh, Josh is diagnosed with diabetes. And the next day I was like, Oh, this is a gift because he can talk now. No, this took, it's a process. We look back on our lives as a whole, which is like, this is the gift of podcasting for me, because it's made me look at my story from the step back from, from the big perspective of like, Oh, that's what happened in the big picture instead of, you know, keeping that little narrow lens. And so I looked at. The music thing, and I was like, oh, maybe, maybe my music dream can look different than I thought that it did. If Josh's journey to speaking can look so wildly different than I ever had anticipated. Maybe my journey to music can look completely different than I ever thought. And so I took a songwriting class and I hadn't written my own music since middle school. And I had this realization that like, oh, I don't even like opera! What? I was only pursuing opera because I thought I was too fat to be on stage to sing my own music. And like, I had this, you know, this realization of like, wait a minute, if I actually got what I wanted, it would mean me being gone from my kids every night at rehearsals and doing performances. And I was like, wait a minute, that's not the life that I

Kristin

want. Oh, bless you. I don't like opera either. Right?

Karaleigh

I'm like, I love singing it. It's so much fun to sing, but I hated, like, I didn't listen to it for fun. I didn't even like going to the opera. I was like, meh. Singing it was really fun, but like I didn't just listen to it, but writing my own music gave me the freedom to, like, sing what I wanted to sing about. I was like, wait a minute, if I was doing opera, or any kind of theater for that matter, like, somebody else would be telling me what to wear. Someone else would be doing my makeup. Somebody else would be telling me where to stand and what to do every single second. I was like, that would suck. Why did I have this dream for the last, like, 20 years of my life? Did I ever really think this through? And then so I started on this whole journey of like learning how to write better music and write from my soul and how to produce my own music and how to, like, write really, you know, just really good music and how to. I wrote my own album. I wrote and produced and released my own album, and my album's called Sneaking Sunshine, and at the same time that I was writing my album, it was when I launched my podcast, Sneaking Sunshine, and started telling my story, and as I processed my story, I was processing all these emotions into music, and I released album in May of 2023, and I released my album in May of 2023, Which is no longer this year, which I've been saying for a long time. But then I started writing custom songs for people and writing custom podcast music, and it was like, Oh, have to be on stage performing every night, which. Would be great, but it doesn't work for my kids, doesn't work for my life. I can actually be home and still use all my gifts and my talents. I can still speak. I can still have an impact and have influence. I can still use my voice and my musical gifts to help people and do it from home with my kids. Like, this is actually all possible and it looks completely different than I ever thought that it would because of podcasting. And like one of the songs that I wrote is called Wait and the chorus is, maybe it doesn't have to look the way you thought it did. Maybe it's not too late to change your mind and change the world. Don't give up just yet. Wait. And it's kind of been like, it's funny, this theme that like. Yeah, it's my song and it's the, that's the background music that I use underneath my intros and my, all my things and like, my husband was like, that song saved me because it's like, All those times when we're like, I don't see the next step. I don't see the future. I don't see how this is going to be different. Just wait, there's hope

Kristin

that there is something more coming. And sometimes it's really, really hard to hope. That there's a lot of power in it and it's not the same as wishing. Hope and wishing are not the same. Like wishing doesn't have that same kind of power. But there's a lot of impact when you have hope that things can be different, even if you can't imagine exactly how. But you have hope that there is something there. I think that something materializes. I think it's like, you know, everyone talks now it's, it's big to talk about manifesting and whatever. And, but like, honestly, our thoughts have such a huge drive to what our futures are going to look like. So call that manifesting, call it not whatever the energy we bring to life, it does return to us. Not always in the time that we wanted to, not necessarily in the way we expected, you know, listening. talk about your experiences. I think about times where we heard a no and didn't get what we wanted. And one in particular, we went to law school. I say we, my husband went to law school. I helped him with the logic games when he was preparing to take the LSAT. Cause that was the part I was good at, but I did not go to law school, but we had two little kids. And when he came and he said, I think I should go to law school, but we already have two kids. I was like, we're still in our twenties. Like, please don't be 45 and tell me you want to go to law school, but like we're in our twenties. We can do anything. Our kids are little. And so his first year, his first semester, he'd never really learned to study. My husband's super brilliant, but that allowed him to not really study and do well enough in school. And so suddenly he was kind of being asked to study and he ended up in a study group that wasn't super helpful and his first semester grades were not what he was looking for. And So that first summer, you know, you do these like internships or different things in between in the summer. And there was an opportunity for a paid one. And as like having a family, and we were like one of the only families there, like people at the law school were not like, you know, or younger people who weren't married. And we did not get that internship. And I was so devastated because I felt like I'm doing everything I can. And we really needed that money, quite frankly, to actually like live. And it was really rough to figure out what to do. And in the end, he ended up taking Some extra classes over the summer he hadn't planned on, and he did very well on those, and it changed his GPA enough that when the interviews came in the fall for what we do the next summer, he was able to interview with a firm that wouldn't have taken him, had he not taken those summer classes. And then because of his experience with that firm, he was able to end up out of law school, work for Sidley Austin, who's a huge firm and, and all these things. And I look at like, if I had gotten the prayer to have that one internship, cause I was like in it right. You're in the middle of it. You don't have that like broader focus. You're just like in the willows in that moment. That's all I could see. And that was the answer to all our problems, to me, was to get that one internship. But I'm so grateful that he didn't because if he had gotten that internship, our whole life trajectory would have changed in like dramatic ways that I can't imagine would have been as good. As what we were given. Sometimes those no's feel devastating. Like you didn't get into the opera program, you know, and you really wanted that, but like, what would you give up if you'd gotten that yes? So many things that you wouldn't want to give up and for opera, like, I mean, bless the people who are good at opera, I'm like, well,

Karaleigh

and it's funny, cause I'm like, I'm, I'm good at opera. Like it wasn't like, if it was any other school, I am actually sure that I would have made it. And I had chosen BYU because they were so family friendly. And what's amazing was like, I ended up double majoring. In family studies with an emphasis in sewing and theater studies with an emphasis in costume design. And I loved studying costume design and makeup design. Like I did makeup, like special effects, makeup design. And as I looked back on, like, I'm not doing that, not doing that, like pursuing that as a career and all of that. And it's like, so then what was the benefit of it? It's like, I gained so much confidence. In myself, and in who I am, and my abilities, and what I can bring to this world through that costume design major, so much confidence. That's huge! It changed me.

Kristin

How many times do we feel like we're stumbling because we don't have enough confidence? Like, if that's all you got out of college, that's huge! That's a huge benefit, and I'm sure there was more to it than that. Yeah. That's phenomenal. Yeah. Because then it also prepared you to be able to then have confidence to podcast and to produce your own music and to, you know, reach out and create a group and do this. And you know, tell me a little bit more about the community you're forming. I know we have been in a podcasting community together, which has been fantastic. And I love, like, to me, that was like the best part of being part of it. Was not just the instruction part, but it was the networking part in the making these fantastic connections with people who are cheering you on. Like, I just can't underscore how valuable that's been to me, but about your vision moving forward for this podcast community that you're creating. Yeah,

Karaleigh

so I have my podcast Seeking Sunshine, and my album's also called Seeking Sunshine but I realized that like what I really like, podcasting is my favorite. I love podcasting. It's why I actually started a second podcast, and it's called Podcast Like a Mother, and I teach people how to podcast through that second podcast and so I appreciate it. And now teaching podcasting and I teach podcasting one on one and I'm about to launch my podcasting course coming up in February. And so as sort of part of all that, I just started a Facebook group called the Podcaster Support Network. And it's just a place for all new podcasters to come and share their shows. Because like we need a place for podcasters to come and. have a place where you can share every single episode. You can share all of your questions. You can, every time you want to change your cover art and you're like, I'm not totally sure. It's like, right. It's like, there's so many questions that we have. Right. And it's like, Come share it in a place where we can all support each other and we can go listen to each other's episodes and write each other reviews and like, be a group of people who's supporting each other because we just need that community vibe just like you were talking about.

Kristin

I love that. And we'll put all of that in the show notes about where people can find you. I know you have a website as well. Yeah. And so that will be fantastic. Which is

Karaleigh

just Karaleighgarrison. com, so it's really easy to find if you can spell my name, which is the hard part.

Kristin

I will put it in the show notes. If you had a gigantic billboard that was going to be, like, where everyone in the world could see it, what would you put on that billboard? What message would you want people to have?

Karaleigh

The, to me, the biggest problem in the world that if we could solve this problem, it would solve like almost everything else is people knowing that they matter. So I would put on there, you matter, matter so much. You are needed and you matter and like, that's, that's, that's it. Like you are. needed in this world. Your voice matters and you have a difference that you can make. People need your presence right here, right now.

Kristin

I love that. And I think it's so true. And I think it changes everything about how you go through life if you feel like you can make a difference, whether your job is, you know, to be a CEO of something and you're realizing you can make this difference, whether your job is you're a retail employee. And customers are coming through and they're coming from all different spaces and you can make a small difference in their day or whether you're a mom that stays home and you are with your family all day or you're a mom who works from home or all the like, if you know that you matter and that you can have an impact, it changes the way you view life and you will feel better about life. You feel that purpose to live a purpose driven life, and you'll make life better for other, other people.

Karaleigh

You start teaching other people that they matter, because moms who know how much they matter start teaching their kids how much they matter. And moms who don't feel like they matter, guess what message you're teaching your kids?

Kristin

It's so true. And you think if you sacrifice everything of your own, like lay yourself out on the altar, that that is going to be like the magic thing that teaches your kids just how much you love them. And there is a place a hundred percent for mom sacrifice. But if you sacrifice beyond what's maybe reason, I don't know what the word is and how you find like that balance, but if you don't preserve. Some self love and some self care, really, you're teaching your kids that they don't have permission to do that either.

Karaleigh

They follow your example?

Kristin

It's not the message you mean to send, but if you don't find that place, and it's hard, and we don't do it in every season, and I'm coming out of a season where I really didn't do it, and I'm working on doing it more. Okay. And so if you're not doing it now and you're listening, it's okay. We've all been there.

Karaleigh

We're teaching our kids what motherhood means and what does it mean to you?

Kristin

Absolutely. And when you still go after what you're passionate about, you show them that they can go after what they're passionate about, which doesn't have to be something big. It can be something very small that really you are just doing at home. There's nothing wrong. Like I, I don't like when women feel like, well, if I don't start a podcast, start a business, you know, become an influencer or whatever that I'm not doing. No, no, no. If your place is at home and you feel good about that, then like you go for it, but do it with a passion that this is what you, that the purpose that you're feeling and feel good about doing that. But it's finding that place where you are living. With some purpose and you're feeling attached to that purpose and that you matter and that others matter. I love that message. Karaleigh, it's been fantastic to visit with you. I'm so grateful for this time and space that here we've been trying to meet up and at least we met up on Zoom. We've got that going for us, the gift of podcasting and we'll definitely put in the show notes everything about how to reach Karaleigh. If you're looking for podcasting support, especially if you want a custom song, I actually considered. Thank you. Having Karaleigh do a custom song for me. Yours

Karaleigh

is amazing though. I heard it. It is so good. You did an awesome job.

Kristin

There's this part of me that really, I've never composed anything in my life that I can remember. I mean, maybe when I was five years old, but I've always liked to sing and I've always liked music and I play the piano and help lead a choir, but I really felt like there was. Like a jingle inside of me that needed to come out. So I was like, I am going to figure this out because it needs to be mine. but if I were not doing that, I would have reached out to,

Karaleigh

no, I think yours, if you can, like, if you have it in you to like sing it and do it yourself, always do that. Like always do that. I

Kristin

learned about garage band. It's like that one random app on my phone. I never used before, but. I love it. Semi expert. No, I'm just kidding. I'm barely proficient, but it was enough. Technology's fantastic. Thank you so much for being here. And thank you for listening to another episode of Solidarity Sister.

Outro Music

Kristin

Wasn't that awesome? Big news for our same day listeners. Today, Karaleigh is hosting a free one hour webinar called Mobile Podcasting Made Easy. Did you even know that you can produce a podcast straight from your phone? Karaleigh can show you how. Her Podcast Like a Mother podcast creation course is a great option if you're looking for for more than just one hour of support. I love the way Cara Lee has made the first two segments free so you can get an idea of what she can offer you before needing to order. Links to register for the webinar and to start the course are both in the show notes. Solidarity Sister celebrated two months yesterday. I'd love for you to celebrate with me by sharing a favorite episode with a friend or leaving a review if you haven't yet. And see the show notes if you need to figure out how to join the Solidarity Sister Book Club as we read Brene Brown's Gifts of Imperfection together. Thursday night marks our fourth Zoom call out of 15, and we'll be discussing the things that get in the way. Thank you for being part of the Solidarity Sister community. We needed you.